![]() My husband, Josh Barbanel, learned he had colon cancer in February 2020, just as the pandemic was hitting. If nothing else, it would be a night out. Perhaps I would finally be able to just say “Doing well!” It would be sort of a do-over, I imagined, but this time I could concentrate on distancing myself from the pain of death, recapturing the joy of life and moving on. Sara through the movie - to figure out how to emerge from the darkness as I watched his character counsel a fictional patient with terminal cancer. Here, maybe, was a chance to go back to the beginning and relive that time with Dr. Deneuve, would help me find some kind of message in my husband’s unexpected death. Why would I want to subject myself to a movie about cancer? Then I thought, maybe seeing my experience reflected on the big screen, graced by a famous actress like Ms. I agreed to his invitation with some trepidation. Sara reached out to me by email, this time to invite me to a screening of the movie at the French Institute Alliance Francaise. If I were to be more honest, or more precise, I would say: functional in the daylight, terrified at night. “Up and down,” I usually say, to be diplomatic. Or when the undertaker and his assistant carried away the body of my husband, wrapped in a flowered sheet that I had taken with me to college.Įvery day, people ask me how I’m holding up, and it is hard to know how to answer. Like when my cousin Tommy took a picture of his father’s corpse on his death bed because he could hear his mother in his head saying, “Get a picture, get a picture” at important family events. There are some moments that make you laugh because they are so out of place that you don’t know what else to do. His professional mask was slipping, and I was intrigued by what was underneath.ĭeath is funny that way. Telling me about it was tactless, yet I didn’t hold it against him. ![]() I could still hear the exhilaration of that reception at Cannes in his voice. Deneuve and the rest of the cast, basking in an eight-minute standing ovation for “Peaceful,” a movie about a young man who comes to terms with his terminal cancer by facing up to some of his regrets in life and standing up to his loving but domineering mother, played by Ms. Sara had been at the Cannes Film Festival, in a tuxedo, with Ms. As we spoke, he told me that he was sorry he had not been in town for Josh’s death he had been cast in a movie as a cancer doctor. ![]() Gabriel Sara, was starring in a film opposite the legendary French actress Catherine Deneuve. It was not until shortly after my husband, Josh, died in the summer of 2021 that I learned his oncologist, Dr.
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